Call of the Cheeseburger

These days, I have been eating considerably less Cheeseburgers. This is mostly because I want to enjoy them, REALLY enjoy them when I actually do have one. In that "close eyes, moan, blink, look at sandwich, close eyes, savour and shake head" sort of way. And so, it's abstinence for the most part.

As a result of this I tend to find myself aching for one by the time I get around to letting myself consume one. And I do mean aching.

It's like a drug that isn't required every day. It's utterly bizarre.

I'm feeling the Call of the Cheeseburger.

Inbox

----- Original Message -----
To: Donna
From: Thérèse
Subject: The Perfect Cheeseburger

Someone I do not know who lives in Vancouver just emailed me to tell me that the perfect cheeseburger exists in Montreal, in a place called Cosmo's on Sherbrooke street W. Isn't that GREAT?!



----- Original Message -----
To: Thérèse
From: Donna
Subject: You have gone off the deep end

Doesn't it seem odd to you?????

Random cheeseburger crazy people are contacting you. Soon it's going to turn into a religious cheeseburger cult and you are going to find people holding up cheeseburger places for all their cheeseburgers and YOU are going to be the responsible one.



----- Original Message -----
To: Donna
From: Thérèse
Subject: Reason is overrated

Well, no.

As long as I'm the cult leader.

I dream of Cheeseburger

And this is what it looks like.

-----------------

Floating Cheeseburger - Hi Therese.
Me - Whoa! You're a floating cheeseburger!
FC - Yes Therese.
Me - How is it that you are THAT enormous! You're like... the size of my head!
FC - Yes, I know Therese.
Me - Okay how do you know my name?
FC - Well, we've been talking about you.
Me - "We"?
FC - Over at headquarters. You're a girl who likes her Cheeseburgers.
(smiles, nods, as much as a cheeseburger can) We love that in a girl.
(winks)
Me - Hm. Go figure. So you approve then.
FC - Do we ever. You've increased our popularity.
Me - Huh. Didn't think I was making that big a difference.
FC - It's really a chain reaction thing.
Me - Oh.
FC - Just wanted to let you know.
Me - Ooookay. Um, thanks. I think.
FC - No, thank you. And here. Have a parting pickle. It's delicious.
Me - Mmmm, floating picccckllllleeee...

-----------------

I woke up before I could taste the pickle, which was momentarily
disappointing cause it looked damn good.

And again

This is happiness in email form.

I will admit that when I first saw the words without the photograph, yes, it gave me kind of a start.

---------- Original message ----------
From: Naomi
Date: Apr 17, 2006 3:16 PM
Subject: Congratulations!
To: Thérèse

You Can Eat Me Now

Guess who had a Cheeseburger at 10:40pm last night.

Go on.

Guess.

(pause)

YES! IT WAS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 3945459347578

Lent has definitely served its purpose. Every single time I've wanted a Cheeseburger, I've said no to myself and been reminded of why I am doing this. That's a lot of reminding. I think about Cheeseburgers about once a day. Seriously. So it was a good choice for me.

But it will be over soon. All over. In less than one week. There are 6 days left.

I keep daydreaming about Cheeseburgers. Cheeseburgers dancing. Cheeseburgers laughing. Juicy, juicy Cheeseburgers. Yummy, yummy Cheeseburgers.

Sooooooon...

the light at the end of the tunnel

I can see it. It is 12 days away. 11 if I don't count today. And who wants to count today? I mean, today is almost over! It's half... it's... it's just that... It's lunchtime.

In other news, check this out.

Major McCheese.

I wonder what an individual would have to do or how said individual would have to apply for a cheeseburger-headed mascot to become said individual's cheeseburger blog's cheeseburger-headed mascot. And I'm sure said individual would have no problem sharing, either. I mean, it's hypothesis. I'm just wondering, really.